Castles in the Air ... Filled with Books

I took my four "middle" kids to the library book sale with me today. Kate must have had wonderful ideas in her imagination about what this sale was going to be like, because once we got to the children's section she asked, very hopefully, "Where's the princess aisle?"

Some Out-of-Print Goodies

We had our annual library book sale today and found lots of wonderful goodies. Here are a few out-of-print ones that look particularly good, most of which can be found in abundance on Amazon.com (used) for a real bargain. Please note that I haven't had a chance to read through every word yet...

Explore America: Historic Places (Reader's Digest)

The Frugal Gourmet on Our Immigrant Ancestors: Recipes You Should Have Gotten from Your Grandmother

Journeys into Medieval England by Michael Jenner (gorgeous photos of medieval architecture , both intact and in ruins, text looks surprising balanced, though the assassination of King Edward II is rather gruesome)

Amazing Buildings by Philip Wilkinson (DK)

Working a little on the "Green" Thing

I did it. I made a little step in the "green" direction. And no, it didn't have anything to do with San Francisco's new law. Like many good things, it was inspired by a friend - actually my sister and brother-in-law (combined with being somewhat disgusted at the number of plastic bags we go through around here - even though we always reuse them for something else). So... I bought a couple of those cloth shopping bags at the local grocery store. They're only $4 apiece, they're super-tough, they're quite roomy and they have nice wide handles that don't cut off the circulation in your hands. Works for me!

More About Love...

Saint Paul, in his hymn to charity, teaches us that it is always more than activity alone: "If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but do not have love, I gain nothing". This hymn must be the Magna Carta of all ecclesial service; it sums up all the reflections on love which I have offered throughout this Encyclical Letter. Practical activity will always be insufficient, unless it visibly expresses a love for man, a love nourished by an encounter with Christ. My deep personal sharing in the needs and sufferings of others becomes a sharing of my very self with them: if my gift is not to prove a source of humiliation, I must give to others not only something that is my own, but my very self; I must be personally present in my gift.

This proper way of serving others also leads to humility. The one who serves does not consider himself superior to the one served, however miserable his situation at the moment may be. Christ took the lowest place in the world - the Cross - and by this radical humility he redeemed us and constantly comes to our aid. Those who are in a position to help others will realize that in doing so they themselves receive help; being able to help others is no merit or achievement of their own. This duty is a grace. The more we do for others, the more we understand and can appropriate the words of Christ: "We are useless servants". We recognize that we are not acting on the basis of any superiority or greater personal efficiency, but because the Lord has graciously enabled us to do so. There are times when the burden of need and our own limitations might tempt us to become discouraged. But precisely when we are helped by the knowledge that, in the end, we are only instruments in the Lord's hands; and this knowledge frees us from the presumption of thinking that we alone are personally responsible for building a better world. In all humility we will do what we can, and in all humility we will entrust the rest to the Lord.(Deus Caritas Est)

Charity, Teens and the Principle of Subsidiarity

We finished discussing Pope Benedict XVI's Encyclical Deus Caritas Est last night. I blogged on this segment last year when I first read the encyclical, but *I* definitely got more out of it discussing it with the group and reading it a second time.

This second half is about the Church's charitable activity, and the nature of charitable action and charitable needs.

We spent a lot of time talking about the principle of subsidiarity and the role of faith in keeping even the best-intentioned people working in politics and charity from "the danger of a certain ethical blindness caused by the dazzling effect of power and special interests."

Part of this involved simply the nature of government - in fact we spent much of our time discussing the difference between having decisions made regarding disaster-relief and the needs of the poor on a national level vs. a local level. It makes sense that some things are better done by local government or charitable organizations who are able to provide personal interaction according to the needs of individuals. It's not just a matter of coordination and plenty of resources; as one of the girls put it - "People aren't bridges!" In our efficiency-based culture we do have a tendency to expect the federal government to handle people the way they handle bridges.

That doesn't mean government has no role in making sure people's basic needs are met. Unfortunately, they often have a track record in many areas of causing new problems (consider the foster care system!) and thwarting the efforts of charitable organizations (such as causing the closure of charitable Catholic hospitals by trying to force them to perform abortions). The encyclical says: "We do not need a State which regulates and controls everything, but a State which, in accordance with the principle of subsidiarity, generously acknowledges and supports initiatives arising from the different social forces and combines spontaneity with closeness to those in need. The Church is one of those living forces; she is alive with the love enkindled by the Spirit of Christ....In the end, the claim that just social structures would make works of charity superfluous masks a materialist conception of man: the mistaken notion that man can live "by bread alone" - a conviction that demeans man and ultimately disregards all that is specifically human."

This was interesting too:

Christian charitable activity must be independent of parties and ideologies. It is not a means of changing the world ideologically, and it is not at the service of worldly stratagems, but it is a way of making present here and now the love which man always needs. The modern age, particularly from the nineteenth century on, has been dominated by various versions of a philosophy of progress whose most radical form is Marxism. Part of Marxist strategy is the theory of impoverishment: in a situation of unjust power, it is claimed, anyone who engages in charitable initiatives is actually serving that unjust system, making it appear at least to some extent tolerable. This in turn slows down a potential revolution and thus blocks the struggle for a better world. Seen in this way, charity is rejected and attacked as a means of preserving the status quo. What we have here, though, is really an inhuman philosophy. People of the present are sacrificed to the moloch of the future - a future whose effective realization is at best doubtful. One does not make the world more human by refusing to act humanely here and now. We contribute to a better world only by personally doing good now, with full commitment and wherever we have the opportunity, independently of partisan strategies and programs.

There's a lot more great stuff in this encyclical - it's really a great read. It also seems like providential timing that just this week I discovered a local charitable organization that distributes clothes, toys and other things that would welcome Ria and Gus as volunteers. I'm hoping to make this a weekly activity for them. After all, as the Holy Father put it:

Significantly, our time has also seen the growth and spread of different kinds of volunteer work, which assume responsibility for providing a variety of services. I wish here to offer a special word of gratitude and appreciation to all those who take part in these activities in whatever way. For young people, this widespread involvement constitutes a school of life which offers them a formation in solidarity and in readiness to offer others not simply material aid but their very selves. The anti-culture of death, which finds expression for example in drug use, is thus countered by unselfish love which shows itself to be a culture of life by the very willingness to "lose itself" for others.

There are a number of homeschool gurus who consider regular service work an essential part of a child's education. If memory serves me right, John Taylor Gatto and Raymond and Dorothy Moore both advocate this. Makes a lot of sense to me!

Maybe He Doesn't Get Out Enough...

A few evenings ago I took Frank on his first walk of the season. He tightly gripped my hand (while I stubbornly refused to let the dog escape with the other) as we sauntered (and occasionally trotted) around the neighborhood.

I heard a little sigh beside me. "Dis is a WEELY fun twip!" he said.

Ria's Self-Portrait

I think that Ria's artwork has made incredible progress this year since she's started a local art class. She doesn't seem to believe me.

Bernie's opinion is that it's very nice and she liked how the cheeks seem to stick out on it. :)

Another Prayer Request from Katrina

Please pray again (continue to pray!) for my friend Katrina - she and I were best friends since our homeschool days back in the 80s. She's just in her upper thirties, has three young children and has been suffering from a debilitating disease for a number of years now. Several previous diagnoses seem to have been incorrect - including Lou Gehrig's disease, but she's stumped all the doctors so far. She gave me permission to share this with you.

Hello All,

I have some news to tell you!

Mayo Clinic in Arizona has agreed to see me! They won't make an appointment with you unless they think there is some chance they can HELP you!!!! So I had to do an interview with them over the phone, send them an email of my last 5 years, and then they put my case in front of a board and talked it over for the last week and a half. They decided to let me come May 15th. The bad thing is that they don't accept my insurance nor would my neurologist be backing me up to see them anyways since he thinks he did all he could for me. It's in the nick of time because the disease is moving to my upper body. I have the same nerve twitching, nerves short circuiting and dying, that I had when my legs went. It's in my neck, near my heart, arms, and torso so it's been really worrying me and keeping me up at night. We are going to drive out to save on airfare and rental car. It should only take 11 hours blah.. I get carsick big time.. but it's the better way since we have the wheelchair, walker, etc.. and since we won't have the plane ticket then if we have to stay more than a week then we don't have to worry about anything. I did try to see them earlier because I feel like I will be worse waiting a month and a half but there are no cancellations and everyone seeing them is in need so my case isn't any emergency compared to theirs. :) We are just trying to figure out the big stuff but please pray they can help me.. to figure out something because it is progressing and I am worried for myself.. hate to sound needy but prayers really are working for me :)

Take care, Katrina

Happy Feast of the Annunciation!

May we all follow Mary's example and say "Yes!" to God.

Announcing: Love2learn Moments on Catholic Radio

After many months of uncertainty, I've been told by people-who-should know that my "Love2learn Moments" - one minute spots on Relevant Radio on topics relating to family life and education (especially for homeschoolers, though many topics would apply more broadly) - will begin airing tomorrow. I don't know a lot about how these things work, but I believe this is starting out just in the Milwaukee area market. Each "moment" will air four times a day for a week before switching to a new one. I think that if you have Relevant Radio in your area, you can contact them to request this piece. Prayers are appreciated as we fully embrace this new endeavour. You can visit the Love2learn Moments blog here.

Nine Month Impossible Novena Begins

There's a beautiful nine month novena that starts on the feast of the Annunciation, and ends on Christmas; commemorating the nine months that our saviour was in the womb of the Blessed Virgin Mary. It's fairly simple and easy to memorize. You pick three "impossible" intentions to pray for and I've heard (and experienced) many amazing stories of prayers answered. I've included a link in the sidebar for convenience.

UPDATE: Dr. Thursday reminds me that the Feast of the Annunciation is transferred to March 26 this year since it the 25th falls on a Sunday. So I suppose you could start the novena today or tomorrow.

Hail, Holy Queen, Mother of Mercy, our life, our sweetness and our hope! To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve; to thee do we send up our sighs, mourning and weeping in this valley of tears. Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy towards us; and after this our exile, show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb Jesus. O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary.

Pray for us, most holy mother of God.
That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

All Virgin of the Incarnation, a thousand times we greet you, a thousand times we praise you for thy joy you had when God was incarnated in you. Because you are so powerful O Virgin and Mother of God, grant what we ask of you for the love of God.

[state your first intention]

Repeat all of the above for your second and third intentions

Remember, O most Gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help or sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of Virgins, my mother. To thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me. Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee, blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Blessed and praised be the Most Holy Sacrament of the Altar, in Heaven, on earth and everywhere. Amen.

Fr. Thomas Dubay on Age Quod Agis

I just stumbled upon this quote this morning...

Little children live intensely in the present moment, neither in the past nor in the future. As the French writer La Bruyre once put it, ‘Children have neither past nor future, but they have something we seldom have—they rejoice in the present.’

This is the child-like trait which the New Testament would have us imitate. Age quod agis—literally, ‘do what you are doing’…The future does not yet exist and the past is gone forever. What we have is the present moment. By it we are fashioning our eternity.… Fr. Thomas Dubay, SM, LIVING FAITH, Sept. 30, 2002

I found the quote here. Click here to read my old posts (and links to others' posts) on this topic.

It's kind of funny to find this quote by Fr. Dubay, because I think I first mentioned this old Latin motto in a post about one of Fr. Dubay's books - but only because it reminded me of the motto, which I found in another book by a different author. It's neat that Fr. Dubay also appreciated this phrase; this quote is the nicest elucidation of the concept that I've come across.

Dividing is Multiplying

at least in Frank's little world.

Kate came in early this morning to bring me a doll for the poor. We've been doing a little spring cleaning (good timing for the Easter Seals truck to come by) and I've been very impressed with her generosity. (She brought me two last night as well - she HAS collected a lot of dolls, being the 4th girl in the family!)

So Frank groggily woke up to tell me that he didn't want to give his "outfit" to the poor. He was wearing a fuzzy bright blue sleeper with a big brown dog across the front. I asked him about it and he explained further... "If you zip it down, you have two dogs."

Prayer Request...

Please pray for my sister-in-law's mother, Paula, who "was ambulanced to the
hospital with what might be congestive heart failure." Thanks you so much!

A random quote from Cardinal Ratzinger on the Liturgy

Not much about Sacred Architecture in Ratzinger's Feast of Faith: Approaches to a Theology of the Liturgy, but I thought this was quite interesting...

The original meaning of what nowadays is called "the priest turning his back on the people" is, in fact - as J.A. Jungmann has consistently shown - the priest and people together facing the same way in a common act of trinitarian worship...

More B16 - Different Topic

After last night's discussion and after the kids went to bed, I read some of Cardinal Ratzinger's writings on Sacred Architecture (in preparation for that Architecture Unit Study I'm working on) from A New Song for the Lord: Faith in Christ and Liturgy Today. It's a lot about "living stones" and how that's is the more primary sense of a church and gives meaning to the physical form as well. Here are a few brief highlights...

As a consequence, Christians are now deriving pleasure from making faith visible, from constructing its symbol in the world of matter. The other basic idea is connected to this: the idea of glorification, the attempt to turn the earth into praise, right down to the stones themselves, and thus to anticipate the world to come. The buildings in which faith is expressed are, as it were, a visualized hope and a confident statement of what can come to be, projected into the present.

The spirit builds the stones, not vice versa. The spirit cannot be replaced with money or with history. Where the spirit does not build, the stones become silent. Where the spirit is not alive, where it is not effective and does not reign, cathedrals become museums, memorials to the past whose beauty makes you sad because it is dead. That is the warning, as it were, which emanates from this cathedral celebration. Our history's greatness and our financial potency do not save us; both can turn into debris that smothers us. If the spirit does not build, money builds in vain. Faith alone can keep cathedrals alive, and the question the one-thousand-year-old cathedral is asking us is whether we have the strength of faith to give it a present and a future. In the end, organizations for the protection of historical monuments do not preserve the cathedral, as important and commendable as they are - only the spirit which created it can do this.

The spirit builds the stones, not vice versa - this also denotes the essential replaceability and the fundamental equivalence of all church buildings whether we like it or not.

In St. Ludger's Church in Munster it has always moved me deeply to know that this was the place where Edith Stein struggled with her vocation. And this is just a tiny excerpt from the history of faith and prayer and the history of sinners and saints preserved in our great old churches. Thus they are also an expression of the identity of faith throughout history, an expression of the faithfulness of God which reveals itself in the unity of the Church. Or should it not move us to know that a thousand years ago the bishop of Mainz spoke the same words of consecration and used basically the same missal in his cathedral as his successors today?

God builds his house; that is, it does not take shape where people only want to plan, achieve, and produce by themselves. It does not appear where only success counts and where all the 'strategies' are measured by success. It does not materialize where people are not prepared to make space and time in their lives for him; it does not get constructed where people only build by themselves and for themselves.

The beauty of the cathedral does not stand in opposition to the theology of the cross, but is its fruit...

'Built from living stones' - if there had not been living stones at the beginning, these stones would not be standing here. Now, however, they speak to us. They call upon us to build the living cathedral, to be the living cathedral so that the cathedral of stone remains a present reality and heralds the future.

Discussion - First Half of God is Love

We had a very nice discussion last night on the first half of Deus Caritas Est. I posted on this encyclical when I first read it last year, but looking back, I realized that all my posts are from the second half of the encyclical.

We spent most of our time talking about the Holy Father's description of God's love, trying to sort out the different meanings of eros and agape (still a little confused about his use of the words "ascending" and "descending" - insights would be most welcome!) and the challenge of living our lives in such a way that we are ready to be "visible manifestations of God's love" to others (and the significance of this aspect of family life and of evangelization). This led naturally into a discussion of the Eucharist (both in the encyclical and in our own discussion) since, in order to give love to others, we need to receive love and... God is love!

Here's a string of quotes from the encyclical...

"God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him" (1 Jn 4:16). These words from the First Letter of John express with remarkable clarity the heart of the Christian faith: the Christian image of God and the resulting image of mankind and its destiny. In the same verse, Saint John also offers a kind of summary of the Christian life: "We have come to know and to believe in the love God has for us."

We have come to believe in God's love: in these words the Christian can express the fundamental decision of his or her life. Being Christian is not the result of an ethical choice or a lofty idea, but the encounter with an event, a person, which gives life a new horizon and a decisive direction.

Since God has first loved us (cf. 1 Jn. 4:10), love is now no longer a mere "command"; it is the response to the gift of love with which God draws near to us.

...it is neither the spirit alone nor the body alone that loves: it is man, the person, a unified creature composed of body and soul, who loves. Only when both dimensions are truly united does man attain his full stature. Only thus is love - eros - able to mature and attain its authentic grandeur.

Fundamentally, "love" is a single reality, but with different dimensions; at different times, one or other dimension may emerge more clearly. Yet when the two dimensions are totally cut off from one another, the result is a caricature or at least an impoverished form of love. And we have also seen, synthetically, that biblical faith does not set up a parallel universe, or one opposed to that primordial human phenomenon which is love, but rather accepts the whole man; it intervenes in his search for love in order to purify it and to reveal new dimensions of it. This newness of biblical faith is shown chiefly in two elements which deserve to be highlighted: the image of God and the image of man.

The history of the love-relationship between God and Israel consists, at the deepest level, in the fact that he gives her the Torah, thereby opening Israel's eyes to man's true nature... It consists in the fact that man, through a life of fidelity to the one God, comes to experience himself as loved by God, and discovers joy in truth and in righteousness - a joy in god which becomes his essential happiness...

God's passionate love for his people - for humanity - is at the same time a forgiving love. It is so great that it turns God against himself, his love against his justice. Here Christians can see a dim prefigurement of the mystery of the Cross: so great is God's love for man that by becoming man he follows him into death, and so reconciles justice and love.

Marriage based on exclusive and definitive love becomes the icon of the relationship between God and his people and vice versa. God's way of loving becomes the measure of human love.

When Jesus speaks in his parables of the shepherd who goes after the lost sheep, of the woman who looks for the lost coin, of the father who goes to meet and embrace his prodigal son, these are no mere words: they constitute an explanation of his very being and activity. His death one the Cross is the culmination of that turning of God against himself in which he gives himself in order to raise man up and save him. This is love in its most radical form. By contemplating the pierced side of Christ (cf. 19:37), we can understand the starting point of this Encyclical Letter: "God is love" (1 Jn. 4:8). It is there that this truth can be contemplated. It is from there that our definition of love must begin. In this contemplation the Christian discovers the path along which his life and love must move.

Jesus gave this act of oblation an enduring presence through his institution of the Eucharist at the Last Supper. He anticipated his death and resurrection by giving his disciples, in the bread and wine, his very self, his body and blood as the new manna (cf. Jn. 6:31-33).

The unbreakable bond between love of God and love of neighbor is emphasized. One is so closely connected to the other that to say that we love God becomes a lie if we are closed to our neighbor or hate him altogether. Saint John's words should rather be interpreted to mean that love of neighbor is a path that leads to the encounter with God, and that closing our eyes to our neighbor also blinds us to God.

In the gradual unfolding of this encounter, it is clearly revealed that love is not merely a sentiment. Sentiments come and go. A sentiment can be a marvelous first spark, but it is not the fullness of love. Earlier we spoke of the process of purification and maturation by which eros comes fully into its own, becomes love in the full meaning of the word. It is characteristic of mature love that it calls into play all man's potentialities; it engages the whole man, so to speak. Contact with the visible manifestations of God's love can awaken within us a feeling of joy born of the experience of being loved. But this encounter also engages our will and our intellect. Acknowledgement of the living God is one path toward love, and the "yes" of our will to his will unites our intellect, will, and sentiments in the all-embracing act of love.

Seeing with the eyes of Christ, I can give to others much more than their outward necessities; I can give them the look of love which they crave. Here we can see the necessary interplay between love of God and love of neighbor which the First Letter of John speaks of with such insistence. If I have no contact whatsoever with God in my life, then I cannot see in the other anything more than the other, and I am incapable of seeing in him the image of God. But if in my life I fail completely to heed others, solely out of a desire to be 'devout' and to perform my 'religious duties,' then my relationship with God will also grow arid. It becomes merely 'proper', but loveless.

New Reciprocal Link

Thursday Night Gumbo

"We're two guys — Woodward and Vehige — who get together every other Thursday for dinner (gumbo, if we can), a movie, and conversation about everything from theology to pop culture."

Marriage Meme

I'm tagging myself on this one from Among Women. I've been meaning to record some of these things anyway. The feast of St. Joseph does seem like an appropriate day for this.

1. Where/How did you meet? At Thomas Aquinas College. He was a Junior and I was a Freshman. We started dating in May of my freshman year.

2. How long have you known each other? Almost 20 years.

3. How long after you met did you start dating? Maybe 6 months. I didn't know him very well at first, though he and a friend played a prank on me right around when I first met him. I worked in the development office at night and often by myself. I left the light on and the door locked while I went to the commons to get a snack and they managed to somehow sneak their way in and scare me when I got back - which I thought was very funny, by the way.

4. How long did you date before you were engaged? two years

5. How long was your engagement? a year

6. How long have you been married? 15 years in August

7. What is your anniversary? August 22 - the Queenship of Mary

8. How many people came to your wedding reception? Not sure exactly. We had an informal reception in my parents' house and yard. Probably around 150. We had a second reception once we got to Wisconsin for John's relatives and friends of his family.

9. What kind of cake did you serve? A triple-layer lemon cake with white frosting. I paid a lady from our choir to bake it and my father-in-law (who is a wonder with cakes!) pieced it together, frosted it and made simple edgings and decorations on the morning of the wedding. One of my bridesmaids added fresh flowers and it was topped with a very nice bride-and-groom statuette that my mom and my grandma and my sisters chipped in on for one of my bridal showers.

10. Where was your wedding? St. Simon and Jude Catholic Church, Los Altos, California

11. What did you serve for your meal? Coldcuts, bread and rolls, cheese, salads and misc. goodies (including strawberries dipped in melted chocolate) - we got a lot of our food and all of the wine and champagne from Trader Joe's. (What a bargain - they had really nice champagne - technically sparkling wine - for $3.50 a bottle !) My friends from TAC put most of the food together. They were amazing!

12. How many people were in your wedding party? I think it was 14, counting the flower girl and ring bearer, best man and maid of honor.

13. Are you still friends with them all? Most of them - esp. since most of them were relatives. I'm not very good about keeping in touch with all of my friends in there.

14. Did your spouse cry during the ceremony? I don't think so.

15. Most special moment of your wedding day? The ceremony was beautiful and we had a fabulous choir (the St. Ann Chapel Choir - directed by William Mahrt, who is now the president of the Church Music Association of America). The reception was a lot of fun and I was glad they waited until after John and I left before jumping into the swimming pool in their formal wear! I also loved the toast given by the best man (ahem, the one who instigated the swimming by jumping off the diving board in his tux).

16. Any funny moments? My two year old niece Michelle (now almost ready for college!) kept hugging John and my dad and knocking their home-made boutonnieres off before the ceremony. One of my bridesmaids (now Terri's godmother) solved the problem by affixing them with about six pins each!

17. Any big disasters? no, not really

18. Where did you go on your honeymoon? Sunset Beach in Monterrey Bay. We also visited Mission San Juan Baptista

19. How long were you gone? three or four days

20. If you were to do your wedding over, what would you change? I would have stayed in Monterrey for at least a week! I also would have had the choir sing a beautiful four-part Regina Caeli that I absolutely love (from the TAC choir repertoire). Silly me - I was thinking the song was more appropriate to the Easter season and yet it was the feast of the Queenship of Mary. Duh! :)

21. What side of the bed do you sleep on? um, the left side, I think. It varies.

22. What size is your bed? King

23. Greatest strength as a couple? our friendship for each other

24. Greatest challenge as a couple? Getting everything done!

25. Who literally pays the bills? My husband earns the $$ and I spend them. :)

26. What is your song? We don't have just one song. We used to send each other "various artists" compilations when we we were dating and engaged long distance for my last two years of college. They were very eclectic mixes. John was the DJ while he was at TAC and I've always loved music too. Our tastes coincide quite nicely.

27. What did you dance your first dance to? The Landler

28. Describe your wedding dress: It was a pretty basic satin dress with an embroidered bodice, puffed sleeves and a train. I borrowed it from my sister-in-law who had been married eight years earlier. Long enough that no one really noticed and I had always loved her dress (not that I would have cared anyway if someone had noticed, LOL). I made my own veil to go with it.

29. What kind of flowers did you have at your wedding? White roses, white and pink alstroemeria, and baby's breath. This was kind of neat because my mom had done some consulting for a florist who gave us all of the flowers for free. (My mom has always been great with computers). We (my mom and I and my wonderful maid of honor and bridesmaids) made all the flower arrangements, bouquets and boutonnieres from these flowers. A little flower tape and wire does wonders!

My mom also spent months getting our gardens planted with flowers that would bloom right around the time of the wedding. It was beautiful and fun place to have the reception!

30. Are your wedding bands engraved? no

31. How old were you when you got married? I was 22 and he was almost 25.

Happy St. Joseph's Day

I've linked to several interesting posts relating to St. Joseph in my Google Reader page which you may enjoy reading. Sorry, but including all the links here takes too much time from family life right now. I'm trying to put my more polished efforts into Love2learn and keep in mind that Studeo is more of my "rough drafts and remembering-things" place as well as "my thinking spot".

In the meantime, I'd like to suggest that the feast of St. Joseph is a particularly appropriate day to pray for fathers: our own fathers, our husbands, dads in the military, dads who plug away faithfully at work all day, dads who struggle with addiction or depression, etc.

I'd appreciate it if you say a prayer for a few struggling dads that I've been praying for recently.

Love in the Little Things: Tales of Family Life by Mike Aquilina

I just started this little gem (written by a Catholic homeschool dad and blogger) - and I'm already 3/4 of the way through. It's a very modest and yet in a way astounding collection of random stories about family life that are connected to or speak to our Faith in some way. It's inspiring, encouraging and, in a number of places, laugh-out-loud funny.

Here's a little sampling from a chapter contrasting his severe allergy to cats with an aversion to sin...

If only I had a suffocating feeling whenever I approached a sinful thought, word, deed or omission. If only my neck swelled upon each occasion of impatience with t he kids, insensitivity toward my wife or anger toward those I perceive as enemies. If only my urges to criticize others could be automatically overwhelmed by the desire to see a shopping mall or for some other severe mortification. If only I could see that, while it's irrational to believe in a feline conspiracy to make me sneeze, it's the height of sanity to believe in a vast demonic conspiracy to make me sin.

More when I finish the book.

I think I'll be pairing it up with Danielle Bean's new book for review in Heart and Mind.

Read a sample chapter at the publisher's website.

This morning Kate told me...

that Frank wanted some Corn Beef Cash. :)

Black and White Movies that my Kid Love

A list in progress (some are more appropriate for older kids), inspired by a post on Farm School...

You Can't Take it With You
It's a Wonderful Life
I Remember Mama
Song of Bernadette
Safety Last (Harold Lloyd)
Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
Christmas in Connecticut
Boys Town
Mr. Deeds goes to Town
The More the Merrier
The Spirit of St. Louis
The Pride of the Yankees
Bells of St. Marys
Casablanca
Going My Way

Ria's just starting to enjoy Hitchcock as well.

I have a bunch more I'd like them to see (including Ana's recommendations of some Kurusawa films - can't wait to see her Heart and Mind Unit Study on his works) but I always love suggestions in this area. Especially with the simplicity of Netflix.

A top of the Mornin' to Ya!

Sure we're all doin' a bit of the wearin' of the green this fine mornin'. However, it's a bit of a quiet day for us since John is on another Taiwan trip, so I'll just refer to you last year's much more elaborate post in case you missed it...

Read Here

Happy Saint Patrick's Day All

And one of my favorite Irish Blessings...

May ye get to heaven a half hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Yet Another Book Meme

I found this at St. Francis Academy and thought I'd give it a spin.

1. Hardback or trade paperback or mass market paperback?

I tend to love old hardcovers the best, although paperback are nice for their portability and lightness. Sometimes my wrists start to hurt after reading a heavy hardcover book for awhile.

2. Amazon or brick and mortar?

Both.

3. Barnes & Noble or Borders?

Barnes and Noble - we don't really have a Borders in the area.

4. Bookmark or dogear?

It depends upon the book. Mostly bookmark. If it's a non-fiction book that I'm going to go ahead and mark up anyway, I'll tend to dog-ear it.

5. Alphabetize by author or alphabetize by title or random?

General categorizations by subject and try to keep series/authors together (and off the floor, out of the dog's mouth, etc.)

6. Keep, throw away, or sell?

Keep or donate.

7. Keep dustjacket or toss it?

Toss it - especially if it's a kids' book. They tend to get tangled up in the dust jackets. :)

8. Read with dustjacket or remove it?

Toss

9. Short story or novel?

Novel.

10. Collection (short stories by same author) or anthology (short stories by different authors)?

A little of both.

11. Harry Potter or Lemony Snicket?

Harry Potter

12. Stop reading when tired or at chapter breaks?

Most often, chapter breaks.

13. “It was a dark and stormy night” or “Once upon a time”?

Both

14. Buy or Borrow?

Mostly buy, though most of the librarians know me by name now.

15. New or used?

A lot used, a lot new for review and still manage to buy more new on top of that.

16. Buying choice: book reviews, recommendation or browse?

All three

17. Tidy ending or cliffhanger?

Tidy ending

18. Morning reading, afternoon reading or nighttime reading?

Any time at all and often in-between times as well.

19. Stand-alone or series?

Both.

20. Favorite series?

Probably The Lord of the Rings or Little House ... or Narnia... or one of Hilda Van Stockum's series. Sigh. I'm hopeless. :)

21. Favorite children’s book?

Just one! You've got to be kidding me!

22. Favorite book of which nobody else has heard?

When I was a kid, it had to have been The Phantom Tollbooth. I don't remember meeting or talking to anyone else who had read it. Now, it's hard to say. I'll have to give it some more thought.

23. Favorite books read last year?

The Everlasting Man (though I finished it early this year), the Man who Was Thursday,
Heretics, Orthodoxy, (yes I managed a rather significant Chesterton streak) by G.K. Chesterton

The Wind Blows Free (Bethlehem Books)

Gospel, Catechesis, Catechism by Cardinal Ratzinger

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

and others

24. Favorite books of all time?

I guess I'd have to go with the Bible on this one too. I really enjoyed our Freshman Theology class at TAC where we read the entire Bible over the course of the year and discussed it. I had a particularly fun tutor for that class as well as a non-Catholic (who later converted) that added wonderful elements to the discussion.

25. Least favorite book you finished last year?

The End by Lemony Snicket

26. What are you reading right now?

Milestones by Cardinal Ratzinger
Love in the Little Things: Tales of Family Life by Mike Aquilina
They Call Me the Bacon Priest by Werenfried Von Straaten
The Virtue-Driven Life by Fr. Groeschel

27. What are you reading next?

Uncle Tom's Cabin (for our teen discussion group - a re-read)

Please feel free to tag yourself by dropping me a note in the comment box.

Frankly Speaking part XXIX (so who's counting anyway)

Frank told me today: "When you little and I big, I take care of you AND I wear SHOES!"

Quotation Books

When it comes to spiritual and inspiration reading, this busy mom really enjoys quotation books with little tidbits to read and reflect on. It's certainly not the only reading (or spiritual reading) that I do, but it really fits the bill sometimes. It's not just about busy-ness, sometimes it's just not having enough focus to sit down and work my way through a book. I've noticed that I tend to have spurts of more intensive reading and times when I have trouble focusing - the quotation books are so nice for those off-times.

I just found a wonderful little set of Saint quotation books from Ignatius Press (on sale through Lent). There are four volumes titled Sermon in a Sentence: A Treasury of Quotations on the Spiritual Life: Vol. 1. St. Therese of Lisieux, Vol. 2. St. Francis de Sales, Vol. 3. St. Catherine of Siena and Vol. 4 St. Teresa of Avila.

Here are a few samples...

There is only one thing for us to do during the night of this life: to love, to love Jesus with all the strength of our heart, and to save souls for Him that He may be loved. Oh! the joy of causing Jesus to be loved! (St. Therese of Lisieux)

The King of Glory does not reward His servants according to the dignity of their office, but according to the humility and love with which they have exercised it. (St. Frances de Sales)

Zealously do what is in your power, giving honor to God and your best efforts to your neighbors, trusting that the Holy Spirit will do what seems impossible to you. (St. Catherine of Siena)

A much greater love for and confidence in this Lord began to develop in me when I saw Him as one with whom I could converse so continually. I saw that He was a man, even though He was God... I can speak with Him as with a friend, even though He is Lord. (St. Teresa of Avila)

Other quotation books I enjoy are The Quotable Knox (Ignatius), The Quotable Fulton Sheen (Galilee Trade), The Catholic Book of Quotations (Our Sunday Visitor) and Thoughts of St. Therese (TAN)

Danielle Bean's new book

I just finished Mom to Mom, Day to Day: Advice and Support for Catholic Living by Danielle Bean. Fans of Danielle's blog will undoubtedly be eager to absorb more of her wisdom and good humor. This book is aimed especially at younger moms who are overwhelmed and still trying to figure out how to work out a lot of the details of smoothly running their homes (and lives). I found it "light", but inspiring; helpful, but not preachy. Sure there are things I do differently in my home than she does. But that's not a problem - that's exactly the point!

In the end, I've rejected all the expert parenting philosophies. This isn't because there's anything particularly bad about any of them. Experience has simply led me to employ a different parenting philosophy in their place: my own. I call mine Do What Works Best for your Family.

Something about the book reminds me of one of my favorite quotes - practically my motto for homeschooling "Start by doing what is necessary, then do what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible." (St. Francis of Assisi). Danielle lays out a lot of simple ideas for handling the necessary (like prioritizing housekeeping needs and avoiding mom-guilt) and the possible (like suggestions for simple monthly celebrations relating to the liturgical year - a nice simple starting point, including recipes) that end up adding up to more than we ever dreamed - and are part of - particularly from the outside - what looks impossible to moms who are overwhelmed with their two or three young children.

I'm working on a more detailed review for Heart and Mind Magazine, but wanted to jot some notes down here first.

Frank & Kate sayings...

Kate, after running through the snow barefoot yesterday (a little tearfully and presumably thinking that warm air meant warm snow) - "Mommy, the snow is freeeeeezing!"

This morning, Frank asked for a "graham clapper".

Frank also has a special adjective that the whole family has picked up on. The word is "fraggly". It means something along the lines of wrinkly, like the way your hands and feet get when you're in the bath.

The Eucharist and Teen Discussions

The timing of the Apostolic Exhortation on the Eucharist (released yesterday) was particularly exciting given the schedule for our teen catechism discussions. We had one meeting on the Eucharist and were preparing for a second when we were interrupted with two weeks of sick kids here (last week and this week).

With the release of this document, I've decided to have them read Pope Benedict's great encyclical Deus Caritas Est and then follow it up with this new document on the Eucharist. It'll take us three or four weeks, but that seems a very worthwhile endeavour to further understand and appreciate the gift of the Eucharist. It also makes me grateful for the flexibilities inherent in homeschooling that allow for such incredible detours at the drop of a ... zuchetto. :)

Homeschooler helping the Homeless

A young girl from our Catholic homeschool group has been featured in the diocesan newspaper for setting up a program to help kids in the area get involved with donating food and other necessities to the homeless through an inner-city parish. Read the article here.

Gus in Chicago

Gus tries on cousin Amy's cool research stuff
Originally uploaded by Chez VH.

The impetus for our trip to Chicago on Saturday was to meet up with John's cousin-in-law, Amy, who's does autism research at the University of Chicago (she recently accepted a position at Marquette, so will be local in the near future). She studies the brain waves of autism spectrum children to help understand "what makes them tick." So, we weren't getting an official diagnosis, but she does some basic screening to see who fits in with her study group. Not a bad place to see if further testing would be helpful - and it was free.

So Gus had some academic and social testing done at her office. The academic part is along the lines of an I.Q. test, but not quite as definitive. The social part was to see how he interacts with others (through questions and games) and to look for a number of Asperger symptoms.

I enjoyed getting to sit in on these tests - particularly the vocabulary part of the academic testing which he had a stellar performance on, thanks to our, um, unique academic environment. The other researcher, who performed this test, couldn't keep from smiling (she wasn't supposed to tell him whether his answers were right or not) when typical responses were along the lines of, "Um, this is just a guess, but is it 'tenacious'?" The overall results of this test were particularly reassuring since his tendency to work his way through things very slowly has caused us to by no means cover a full traditional academic range of subjects and yet his overall academic knowledge and competency was quite good.

The social aspect of the screening was pretty what I expected in the particulars (reluctant to answer open-ended questions or ones requiring descriptions of things like emotions).

The long and the short of it is that, though Gus exhibits some Asperger-like tendencies, he really doesn't fit the spectrum in a number of key areas (and so he didn't participate in the full research, though he got to try on some of the equipment - which he was very interested in!). Apparently shyness and awkwardness are often confused with Asperger-like social disabilities. Added to this are Gus's developmental delays in fine and gross motor skills - which certainly can be part of the Asperger picture. Having a specific cause for these (namely his difficult birth - cord around the neck and an initial Apgar score of 1) points away from an Asperger diagnosis. It also makes sense out of why these areas are all gradually improving, though they take a lot more effort than they do for most people.

These experiences have crystallized a few concepts in my mind. One is the necessity to adjust teaching methods according to each child's needs. There are some obvious potential benefits for homeschool situations here - often the parent is better able to make important distinctions in a particular child involving truths such as:

Smart doesn't always equal fast.

and

"Slow" doesn't always equal lazy.

I put slow in quotation marks because the word has certain developmental connotations that aren't intended here.

Trip to Chicago

Chicago skyline in rearview mirror
Originally uploaded by Chez VH.

We had a wonderful time in Chicago on Saturday, hanging out at the Museum of Science and Industry (though we only had an hour by the time we got there and it was SUPER busy, so enjoyed the free train exhibit), visiting cousin Amy's research center (where Gus had his screening) and enjoying deep dish pizza at Giordano's. (Molly, isn't that where you and Stephen went?)

We accidentally got off the freeway about 20 exits too soon and had a delightful drive through Evanston and along the lakeshore all the way through downtown Chicago on the way to the Museum of Science and Industry. It was funny how much the kids enjoyed this detour! The weather was beautiful (45 degrees and sunny!), the windows were cracked open and they loved the scenery (beautiful buildings - perfect for our Architecture Unit Study) and the view of the lake.

The kids did most of the picture taking, though this accidental one is mine. More photos here.

Completely Random Things

I changed my mind on the Love2learn Festival. In the interest of simplicity, I have a link to read the Love2learn festival under links in the sidebar instead.

I love how I'm reminded of the very kind friend who made a donation to our poinsettia fund for the Christmas Eve Mass at our parish every day when I come downstairs. We brought two of the poinsettias home after Mass and they're still in full bloom.

We decoded one of Frank's "mystery" words today. Apparently "wackario" means something that's noisy, like dinosaurs, "bang-bang" or volcanoes.

When it's 20 degrees and sunny, the roof can be a really nice place to grab some fresh air. (Still too much snow on the deck to enjoy that). Definitely a thaw in the air today, though. The thermometer on the north side of the house read 60 degrees, but I don't believe it really got that high. More like upper 40s.

Little Prayer Requests

Would you please offer a quick prayer for...

...my Latin students who are taking the National Latin Exam today

and

...Gus, who will be having an Asperger's screening tomorrow.

"Love2learn Festival"

I've been using Google Reader for a number of weeks now to share most of my "links of interest". I've decided to add a smaller version of that same "festival" in the sidebar here in order to share all of those homeschool articles, prayer requests, etc. with my Studeo readers too. I hope you enjoy it.

Thankfulness Thursday

Sometimes we need these more in March than November. Yes, the snow and the cold are getting just a little old. These pictures were taken yesterday along the path from the back door to the driveway. The railing is on the deck - it's hard to believe there are three steps down at that spot. We kind of gave up clearing the back path for awhile and focused on keeping the driveway clear. John still uses this path every morning - those footprints have gotten a lot of use!

So, here's what I'm thankful for this week...

Sore throat "lollipops". These are easy for little guys to handle (with much less risk of choking than a cough drop!).

Kleenex with Aloe

Thumbnails! I cut my thumb this week and just had to have it taped, but it was clearly my thumbnail that saved me from a much more severe cut.

My mother-in-law's sweet little car I got to use part of the time while she went away for a good chunk of the winter. Parking lots are suddenly a breeze!

Cheap cellphones. Got mine at Target for $20 (+ pay by the minute).

Snowplows.

Sunny days that help clear sidewalk, windshield and roof even when it's bitterly cold.

DVD players - especially when the kids are sick.

Ignatius Press Lenten Sale.

Getting a fun project to work on to beat the late-winter blahs. The kids and I are currently doing an architecture unit study in order to write one up for the summer issue of Heart-and-Mind. (and for a local library that had plenty of material to supplement!)

Braille Book Review

I was excited to find this link, in order to recommend some favorites to my sister-in-law.

Studeo is censored by the Chinese government

Though not all blogger sites are. Read more here.

"The Asteroid Belt"

"The Asteroid Belt"
Originally uploaded by Chez VH.

I love how Kate set up her own little space with this fold-out solar system board book.

Photo by Ria

Visual "DNA"

This was fun...

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Thanks Michele!

Just finished...

I hope to get more thorough reviews written up for love2learn in the near future on these two books...

Animal Farm by George Orwell - I finished reading this for our teen discussion last night - but the discussion was canceled at the last moment due to poor road conditions. It's an interesting little book, a very accessible classic for upper grade school or early high school. Lots of fodder for discussion; don't expect to agree with the author entirely.

The Story of Benedict XVI for Young People by Claire Jordan Mohan - a nice story that overviews his childhood and gives you a good sense of his personality and his upbringing. Worthwhile and lots of good content, but I tend to find the author's writing style distracting.

The Red Letter Alphabet Book

This is one of those nifty little resources that has actually worked for all of my kids I've tried it with (I bought our copy when Terri, now 9, was 3 or 4 years old).

Many people are familiar with Montessori-style sandpaper letters to help children learn the alphabet in a multi-sensory fashion. Children look at the letter, trace it with their finger and say the sound of the letter at the same time. It works, but some children (particularly those who are sensitive to texture) find the rough sandpaper feel very irritating. Besides, the set of sandpaper letters on wooden backings are quite expensive to buy (and a bit of trouble to make). Enter, The Red Letter Alphabet Book. It's a heavy cardstock, comb-bound book with a felt-textured letter on each page. The opposite page has black and white images of objects whose names contain the sound of the letter (you can also buy these images on cards to do related word games).

We've used this book quite casually with each of the children as soon as they were interested in it. We reached this stage with Frank just yesterday. Frank, proving Montessori's maxim of "work" having a "normalizing" effect, was wigged out over something out of our control (can't remember exactly what) and was completely miserable. I knew that this wasn't an occasion for discipline, but for distraction. The Red Letter Alphabet Book was handy and, on a whim, I brought it to him. Within seconds, and without any convincing needed, he was having me trace his index finger over the letters, his face locked in open-mouthed bliss (what a contrast from a few moments before!). He made me do it three times straight through with him right then and there.

These are available from Montessori Services. The same company also makes a Blue Number Counting Book which has also played an important role in our family's learning. I particularly remember Terri first using this book and, basically, falling in love with numbers right then and there. It was partly a matter of introducing this concept at just the right time for her, but I'm very grateful for these simple and gentle books for little ones.

Book and Movie Meme

The instructions are to bold the books you've read and put an *asterisk* next to those whose movies you have seen.

1. Heidi (Johanna Spyri) *
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen)*
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)*
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell)*
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Tolkien)*
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien)*
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (Tolkien)*
8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery)*
9. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte) *
10. Anne of Avonlea (L.M. Montgomery) *
11.The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
12. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott) *
13. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)*
14. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis) *
15. Chariots of Fire (Clarence E. MacArtney)*
16. 1984 (Orwell)
17. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)*
18. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
19. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)
20. War and Peace (Tolstoy - not sure I quite finished this one)
21. Quo Vadis (Sienkiewicz) *
22. The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Victor Hugo)
23. The Robe (Douglas) *
24. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
25. The Story of A Soul (St. Therese)